Saturday, April 9, 2011

Note to Kathwyn

UPDATE: I totally respect your concerns about privacy.  Believe me I have the exact same ones and there are a few things we have done to make it a little more difficult to find us from the blogs.   If you do get a chance to open up a private email though that'd be great.  In the meantime, I imagine most readers of the blog don't mind too much.   I always love your ideas because they not only have that devious genius that makes for fun, but they also have common sense and safety.  Your suggestions on the lessons are solid advice.  There is no way that Xiu will get the chance to lead.  For one thing with their difference in height, it'd probably wind up looking like the video I'm posting below.  Xiu has a great deal of poetic justice coming to her.  I really do like the crossplay idea--you're talking to some nerdy girls here and some of us enjoy anime and American comics too.

If there's a way you'd feel comfortable with us emailing you that'd be great.  However, we can do it this way too.  For the rest of you, I guess you can enjoy a glimpse of our thought process.  We have an unintentional and unofficial mistress meeting going on and we've been talking about the dance classes.  I think your idea about blues dancing might be perfect.  It looks sexy and seductive, which is exactly what we want for the Katie and Xiu.  We have questions though.

How insular is the community?   We'd love for them to go two different classes--one an LGBT class where they could be a couple of lesbians and another a more traditional class where they could get to dance with guys.   It seems like we definitely do have a blues dancing scene here (not surprising, we've got a good blues scene here), but will everybody know each other.

I saw a few skirts and few heels.  If they dress sexier will they stand out?

You said one lesson was enough for follows?  I assume that's whoever's doing the following instead of the leading on the dance floor?

We loved the videos.   You're making me want to take dance lessons and not just to check it out for the sissies beforehand.

Thanks for all your great advice and help!  In this area your knowledge is invaluable.


  1. I love the idea that they'd go to a LGBT class crossdressed.... They'd probably fit right in. Once having attended that class, they would be expected to wear skirts all the time - even in "straight" classes. Very interesting possibilities there....

  2. Please feel free to delete or edit this comment if it gives too much away.

    Regarding the Blues scene... Part 1
    How Insular?

    What you will probably find is that there are at least two levels of dancers.
    The scene will have a core of folks who are serious about dancing. They will be at most the workshops, advanced classes, open dances and house parties and most of them will know each other very well.
    You'll also have casual dancers. These folks are either just beginning or are happy with just having the basics. You'll see them at beginner classes and open dances.

    What this means for Katie and Xiu is that at most events you'll have a core group that will know all about them and another group that won't know anything about them.

    I can't promise how any particular scene will respond, but from my experience, as long as they are friendly and are serious about learning to dance, the core dancers aren't going to mind.

    The caveat to this is that, for the serious dancers their local scene is very important to them and they won't do anything to endanger it. The best approach is to be as honest and truthful as you can with their instructors. Classes are a very intimate environment and they won't fool everyone. If the instructors think they are TG, they can help manage any problems with the other students.

    In most classes, the follows rotate amongst the leads so that all the follows and leads get to dance together. Most instructors will allow you to stay out of the rotation if you tell them you only want to dance with your regular partner, but they will encourage you to rotate because that's the best way to learn social dancing. While most of the leads are going to be men and most of the followers will be women, the better dancers will at some point start taking the beginner classes over as the opposite, i.e. male follows and female leads. (The girls do this a lot more than the guys and personally I think the female leads are going to just adore Xiu and Katie.) This means that from the first lesson they will probably be dancing with both men and women regardless of whether they are taking LGBT classes or regular classes.
    What you may wish to do at regular classes, to make things more acceptable for the other dancers, is to have them attend a session of classes with one of them as a male, and then have them repeat the classes with the other one as a male. (I'm going to suggest that Katie gets to be the guy first since she's taller and blogs more.) Ask the instructor what they would recommend on this point.

    As far as the one lesson thing... that's enough to get most follows started and out on the dance floor. Most large open dances will have a short mini-lesson available for new dancers. If you just want to go out and groove on the dance floor that will work. If you want to get good you'll need to take a several sessions of classes and work on it.
    Being a follow is definitely a skill. You need to learn how to maintain your frame with your partner and not anticipate what move you are doing next. You need to stop thinking too much and just dance. This can be very difficult and a bit zen. Once you get it though, a good lead can make you do dance moves you never even imagined learning.
    For the guys, it can be a lot of work. They not only have to learn their own moves, they also have to learn how to lead their partner to do them too.
    Being a follow is like being on the best roller coaster ride ever. The dance happens to you. Your job is mostly to just follow and add all the little flourishes that make the dance look good.

    Aloha Kathwyn

  3. Please feel free to delete or edit this comment if it gives too much away.

    Regarding the Blues scene... Part 2
    As far as dressing sexy...
    There is no problem if they want to dress a little more feminine, as long as they are dressed appropriately to dance.

    * Clothing should be comfortable and allow you to move freely.
    * You are going to sweat, so try to wear something that breathes and be meticulous about your hygiene.
    * Above all, wear appropriate footwear. Having the right footwear is essential to dancing well. Having actual dance shoes is the key to all of those swivels and spins that make dancing look so sexy. Stick to dance sneakers or flats for lessons and informal socials and save the nylons and heels for more formal occasions. (Check for good deals on dance shoes)

    I think the key for Katie and Xiu to be accepted is for them to act like they are serious about learning to dance. The core dancers will appreciate this and should accept them even if they think they are TG.

    I hope that helps. And please do try to get to know the instructors first before springing this on them. Most serious blues and swing dancers I know have a great sense of fun and will probably enjoy all of this as long as you don't catch them by surprise.

    Aloha Kath

  4. Aloha Again...
    As long as I'm sitting down and writing I had another idea for the gurls. There are any number of anime conventions around the states and most of them have daily cosplay events or halls. Cosplay is like having Halloween every month of the year. Lots of fun and you commonly find guys 'crossplaying' at conventions.
    Google for Crossplay Pictures


  5. On second thought... Both the gurls need to learn to follow but don't bother teaching Xiu to lead. Now I'm mad at him as well and the last thing you need is him dancing lead with another girl.

    Mahalo Kath

  6. Wow Kath has great ideas for the two of them, I thought I submit something else as well for the two of them, If you are continuing going down with the Asian route with Xiu I would think it would be a real good idea for her to at least learn Gilbert and Sullivan's "Little maid's from school are we" Lyrics here

    and definitely have them all be able to perform it on cue, maybe even entering them into a talent show. Or maybe even a flash mob event for them.

    If you want more date game ideas for Xiu and Katie here is another great site with a few ideas for games to spice up the fun. These include games that go over etc


  7. Wow! She looks great as a maid. I wish I looked that good.

  8. Hey one more idea I thought of originally as a date idea for Xiu and Katie I think would be more fun is if you take all the girls to maybe a couple different kereoke clubs and see who can get the biggest applause and the most guys to sing with them.

  9. Mistresses, you will enjoy reading this blog about a mistress that discovered in high school
    that you could get males to do almost anything.
    It's Read the two postings about "The early years". -Bill

  10. Thought the sissies who are going to the wedding
    would like this.

  11. Hi again, just thought I give you a little link to a video I found on you tube, and maybe make a class out of it for the sissies and even some interesting information for yourself, It is a video from a college girl about the history of the french maid and how they became to be sexy french maids, she also has or will have other historical videos on cheer leaders, bunny costumes etc.

  12. Dear Leading Ladies Hi
    Love this site , which somehow I found totally by accident, don't even know how: I have sent in several 'comments' on the different essays, not posted yet.

    You suggested maybe using E Mail, OK , totally up to You obviously. first, a little info : I'm not totally afraid of privacy - I registered here as Dolly S., and that is my actual picture in white lingerie. I'm old enough to be Your grandfather ( makes it very interesting just that - HOW did 19 year olds hit on my exact most intense fantasy ?) and have done a little dress up - went to a straight restaurant once with a genetic woman, I was wearing an above knee A line skirt, heels & stockings. Nothing to what Jill has done.

    Be very careful, I'm sure You recognize there is some actual danger to this, maybe more to the Gurls than You.
    Very Best wishes Dolly S.